The title of this post refers to a memorable experience I had this weekend. Also one I was praying would not occur…
On Saturday I went to a karate class- not your average class, though. It was with a “famous” renowned instructor who everyone treats like a god. He’s known for being good at karate (obviously) and also for being terrifying and brutal. Before everyone enters the hall, our usual instructors check we’ve tied our belts correctly, for fear of us (or them) facing his wrath. Apparently he’s been to prison, for “self-defence”. Now there’s a worrying sentence if I ever saw one.
So we spend three and a half hours in a hall with this guy, while he hands us his pearls of wisdom in the form of demonstrations and explanations of the moves. Often, he picks people out and makes them do a move, or worse, he does the moves on them. And yep, you guessed it, this time it was me.
And it wasn’t an easy, common move either. It was what is in my opinion THE WORST MOVE TO EXIST. You start in an average front stance, and then bend so far forwards that you end up on the floor. You then turn to the side, kick, roll under yourself and kick again. Now imagine doing that, with the scary prison man stood over you, and on either side of you there are spectators- mainly black-belts, too. So yeah, that was me. Then he asked what kick it was, and I said the first thing that came into my head. It was quite hard to tell since it’s performed whilst lying down. But apparently I didn’t say my answer loud enough because he asked me again. Here’s the tragic part: I thought he was asking me again because I’d said the wrong kick, so I replied with my second guess. BUT NO, the first answer was right and I just didn’t say it loud enough. So now he thinks I can’t even recognize a kick.
The good thing is he said I performed the move “beautifully”. That’s great because my next grading takes me to black belt and he’s the assessor for those gradings. So that’s brownie points for me, hopefully. Although I’ll be surprised if he remembers by the time I grade.
So, I was completely dreading being picked out and having to do a move in front of everyone, but I don’t think it went too badly. Apart from the misinterpreted kick scenario. (But apparently some of the guide books say it’s the kick I said the second time, and it’s just his opinion that it’s the first kick. Pfft.)
That was my Saturday. I’ll probably hear about this a lot at the next karate session, so I’ve got that to wait!